Squad Goals: Why I Don’t Have a Large Group of Friends

Squad Goals: Why I don't Have a Large Group of Friends by popular DC lifestyle blogger Alicia Tenise: image of woman standing outside a building with a turquoise door and wearing a Madewell Sash-Tie Wrap Top in Polka Dot, 7 For All Mankind Alexa High-Rise Cropped Wide-Leg Jeans, Schutz Victorie Slide Sandal, Cult Gaia Bamboo Circle Bag, Urban Outfitters sunglasses, Brixton Joanna Hat, Madewell Bandana, and Taudrey necklace.

Shop the Look:
 
Do you have a squad? Because I’ve tried it, and a large group of friends is not for me. 

I think in a way, we have all been conditioned to feel like we need to have a large group of friends — we can probably thank Taylor Swift for that. In college, I was quick to join a sorority. I moved to Philly partially because I met a group of friends there and thought I belonged. I always felt like a BAMF if I “rolled deep” with a large group of friends.

And honestly? As I grow older and learn more about myself, I’m definitely not a “squad” person. And I’m also learning that it’s perfectly ok if you don’t have a huge girl gang.
 
Squad Goals: Why I don't Have a Large Group of Friends by popular DC lifestyle blogger Alicia Tenise: image of woman standing outside a building with a turquoise door and wearing a Madewell Sash-Tie Wrap Top in Polka Dot, 7 For All Mankind Alexa High-Rise Cropped Wide-Leg Jeans, Schutz Victorie Slide Sandal, Cult Gaia Bamboo Circle Bag, Urban Outfitters sunglasses, Brixton Joanna Hat, Madewell Bandana, and Taudrey necklace.

Squad Goals: Why I don't Have a Large Group of Friends by popular DC lifestyle blogger Alicia Tenise: image of woman standing outside a building with a turquoise door and wearing a Madewell Sash-Tie Wrap Top in Polka Dot, 7 For All Mankind Alexa High-Rise Cropped Wide-Leg Jeans, Schutz Victorie Slide Sandal, Cult Gaia Bamboo Circle Bag, Urban Outfitters sunglasses, Brixton Joanna Hat, Madewell Bandana, and Taudrey necklace.

Squad Goals: Why I don't Have a Large Group of Friends by popular DC lifestyle blogger Alicia Tenise: image of woman standing outside a building with a turquoise door and wearing a Madewell Sash-Tie Wrap Top in Polka Dot, 7 For All Mankind Alexa High-Rise Cropped Wide-Leg Jeans, Schutz Victorie Slide Sandal, Cult Gaia Bamboo Circle Bag, Urban Outfitters sunglasses, Brixton Joanna Hat, Madewell Bandana, and Taudrey necklace.

Squad Goals: Why I don't Have a Large Group of Friends by popular DC lifestyle blogger Alicia Tenise: image of woman standing outside a building with a turquoise door and wearing a Madewell Sash-Tie Wrap Top in Polka Dot, 7 For All Mankind Alexa High-Rise Cropped Wide-Leg Jeans, Schutz Victorie Slide Sandal, Cult Gaia Bamboo Circle Bag, Urban Outfitters sunglasses, Brixton Joanna Hat, Madewell Bandana, and Taudrey necklace.

Top: Madewell | Jeans: 7 for All Mankind | Shoes: Schutz | Bag: Cult Gaia | Sunglasses: ℅ Urban Outfitters | Hat: Brixton | Necklace: ℅ Taudrey | Bandana: Madewell

Why it’s ok to not have a large group of friends

For starters, I don’t think it’s realistic for everyone in a “squad” to like each other equally. I loved my Greek life experience in college, but did I like all 90+ people in my sorority? Absolutely not. Did I meet some awesome women that I still keep in touch with, though? Definitely. I found myself having good friends all over the place in college, and I always switched it up.  Especially on the weekend.  Making it a point to hang out with different groups of people.

I tried a blog “squad” in D.C. and quickly learned that it wasn’t for me either. It was another situation where, honestly, I didn’t vibe well with everyone in the squd.  And I disagreed with other “squad” members on some major issues.  Plus, blogging in D.C. can be super cliquey, and I somewhat distanced myself from that whole scene a bit.  But that’s another blog post for another day.

The last “squad” when I was in Philly? Well, to be honest, I don’t talk to any of them at the moment. I initially thought it was super fun to have a large group of friends, but the same issue popped up yet again. The D.C. blog scene was a little too prim and proper for me, and the group in Philly was a little too wild and reckless. I didn’t really fit in with either group.

Instead of having a large group of friends, I honestly prefer to hang out with my good friends on a one on one basis. And to be candid, most of my best friends are scattered across the country, so it’s impossible for me to even get all of my friends all in the same room anyway. Also, when I’m not tied to a large group of friends, I tend to get out of my comfort zone, introduce myself to other people, and make more connections. I can also think like an individual and make the best decisions possible for myself and my future. 

If you’re not a part of a “squad” or don’t have a large group of friends, it’s perfectly ok. It doesn’t work for everyone!  But I’d love to know how you feel.  Are you a large or small group of friends kind of gal?  Share in a comment below!

Photos by Tom McGovern