Coffee Talk: Being in a Long Distance Relationship

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Well, today, instead of coffee, it’s going to be champagne. Because Thursday. 

I don’t make many personal posts on here, but the number #1 thing you asked for in my reader survey last year was more personal posts. And for some reason, a lot of you want to know about my boyfriend. He’s a professional photographer that prefers to stay behind the camera, so I’m not super keen on the idea of throwing him in the spotlight, but I’m happy to share some details of our lives.
 
As some of you know, my boyfriend lives in Charlottesville, VA and I live in Philadelphia. When I first met him, I wasn’t super set on the idea of a long-distance relationship: the last relationship I was in 5 years ago was an LDR, and I ended it because I couldn’t handle being in a long distance relationship. But sometimes, when you meet someone special, you just have to go for it.

Why this time? What makes this LDR work after my last one fell to pieces five years ago? Here are some reasons why I think we were able to pull this one off this time around.

TIPS FOR BEING IN A LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP

Being Confident in Your Career

This has been the #1 reason why this LDR has worked out, and the other one didn’t five years ago: I’ve grown up, I’m a little more mature, and I know what I want out of life and my career. When I was in an LDR 5 years ago, I was just wrapping up the second semester of my senior year of college and 22-year-old me had no idea what she was doing. It was hard to find a job after school, let alone trying to find a job in the town that my boyfriend at the time lived in. In a way, I’m glad it ended because when you’re just graduating from school, it’s hard to get your dream career if you’re tied down to one city.

Now that I know what I want career-wise? It’s easier for me to be in a relationship period, especially an LDR. I know what cities would be beneficial for me to live in (when we ultimately need to make that choice), and me being happier with work makes me a more confident in my relationship. 

Oversharing

This sounds silly, but when my boyfriend and I can’t see each other for a couple of weeks, we overshare. I’ll ask him what I should eat for dinner. He’ll send me photos of his boys night out. We FaceTime a few times a week. It’s nice to get a glimpse into your partner’s daily routine when you’re miles apart, and it kind of makes you feel like you’re right in the same city again.

Traveling + Maintaintaining Other Relationships

I think the hardest part of being in an LDR is being on the road and managing your other relationships. My travel schedule is already pretty insane anyway because I’m a travel blogger, so it’s essential to have a sense of balance in your life. I make it a point to have a wine night with my best friend every 1-2 weeks, I try to visit my mom back in D.C. whenever I can, and I have FaceTime/Skype calls with my other friends who live across the country. An LDR can suck up a lot of your time if you’re traveling and on the road a lot, so just make sure you’re making the same amount of time for all the other people in your life.

Sweater Dress: ℅ Chicwish | Over the Knee Boots: Similar | Lipstick: MAC ‘Rebel’

Want to see more tips about being in a long distance relationship? You can view the article I wrote for Healthline here.

Photos by Tom McGovern